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I gasped, a sudden pain bursting in my chest as my heartbeats raced. I was on my couch, curled up with a book the name of which I could not even remember. I tried to control my breathing, tried to slow it down. Inhale. Exhale. The things doctors suggest to calm down your attacks are always bullshit. Should I count to ten or kill myself? I got up slowly, my vision blurred with dark spots. I blinked several times, trying to see the path to my night table. As I slowly made my way to my bedroom, my

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